How To Start A Conversation On Tinder Without Feeling Awkward

Who here likes to be left on read? Anyone? Nope, didnt think so. Unanswered messages—whether its a text convo with your crush, a group chat that none of your friends responds to, or a hopeful conversation starter on Tinder—are just one more way living in this digital age can make you feel all-caps crappy.

Of course, first impressions are critical in any context, but especially when theres a potential relationship on the line, says Jess Carbino, PhD, a former sociologist for Tinder and Bumble. Thats because humans have a natural desire to “thin slice”—as in, digest small amounts of information (like, whats in your bio) to determine bigger decisions (read: whether this person is worth a date…or more).

To make that intro count, all you have to do is be a little thoughtful and creative in your Tinder opener, but you dont need to rely on cheesy pick-up lines (please dont!). The easiest (and most duh) solution for finding love on an online dating site: “Use what their profile gave you,” Adam Lo Dolce, relationship coach and founder of SexyConfidence.com says.

Not sure exactly how? I rounded up the best tips—and real Tinder conversation starters (that can be used just as expertly on Bumble, or Hinge, or Coffee Meets Bagel, or Facebook Dating or…insert dating app here)—to make at least one part of life a little easier on ya. But one caveat? If you end up engaged, I want an invite to the wedding.

“A lot of people overly invest their time and energy into sending a message and custom-tailoring it. But at the end of the day, it’s truly a numbers game online,” Lo Dolce says, noting that you should keep in mind that the person youre reaching out to could be getting lots of messages (especially on Bumble, where the woman has to initiate).

There are plenty of people on Tinder sending “Hey” and “Hi” messages, which is why yours could be easily overlooked. That why Lo Dolce encourages his clients to make their first message stand out. “Teasing someone is a great way to differentiate yourself,” Lo Dolce says. Those of you who are naturally sarcastic might have to be careful with this one. The teases should still express interest and come off as playful and flirty—not judgmental.

How To Start A Conversation On Tinder: 3 Openers That Get A Response

How To Start A Conversation On Tinder Without Feeling Awkward

Many people forget that the app has its own features that make it easier for people to connect. Garbino recommends checking out a matchs embedded Spotify playlist or latest Instagram post. And no, its not creepy to do! “People spend a lot of time thinking, What do I say about myself? and theyre putting it out there publicly,” Carbino says. So dont be silly—use it.

Of course, first impressions are critical in any context, but especially when theres a potential relationship on the line, says Jess Carbino, PhD, a former sociologist for Tinder and Bumble. Thats because humans have a natural desire to “thin slice”—as in, digest small amounts of information (like, whats in your bio) to determine bigger decisions (read: whether this person is worth a date…or more).

To make that intro count, all you have to do is be a little thoughtful and creative in your Tinder opener, but you dont need to rely on cheesy pick-up lines (please dont!). The easiest (and most duh) solution for finding love on an online dating site: “Use what their profile gave you,” Adam Lo Dolce, relationship coach and founder of SexyConfidence.com says.

If someone has a dreadfully bare profile, youre feeling particularly nervous, or youre just drawing up a blank on the right conversation starter, relax. Take the pressure off yourself and go with an easy Q that can actually tell you quite a bit about a person, based on their cultural interests.

Who here likes to be left on read? Anyone? Nope, didnt think so. Unanswered messages—whether its a text convo with your crush, a group chat that none of your friends responds to, or a hopeful conversation starter on Tinder—are just one more way living in this digital age can make you feel all-caps crappy.

Leave a Comment