How to punish your boyfriend Its a great idea
How To Deal With Bad Behavior The Right Way
Withholding sex from your partner might not be abuse as some experts claim that it is, but it’s not going to do your relationship any favors if you don’t have sex for long periods of time either.
It’s important that you encourage the behaviors that you want to see, and don’t use punishment the wrong way. There are quite a few ways that you can help your boyfriend turn his behavior around.
If your man has a very different personality than yours, he might not realize that he’s doing anything wrong. A sociable boyfriend will talk to other women, but mean those interactions in a strictly platonic way. It can be easy to misunderstand his actions as him flirting with other women.
Make sure that you talk to him about his actions, and how they make you feel, before instantly setting out to punish your spouse for bad behavior.
Men will do what they want, even if we don’t like it. If your spouse consistently cheats on you, it’s not going to help your relationship if you try to make him stay home or with you at all times.
Instead, this can lead to him having suppressed resentment towards you. In the end, he won’t be happy in the relationship. Instead, you want to help him change the behavior that is causing tension.
If he goes out drinking with his friends all night on your anniversary, don’t suck it up. Don’t have passionate sex all night. Instead, give him absolutely nothing. Tell him it hurt your feelings, you deserve better than that because you’re an amazing woman, and go to sleep.
This single-night episode is a bit different than withholding sex until your demands are met. It sends him a message. This form of punishment is different than saying you’re not going to have sex until your man buys you the new pair of shoes that you want. When you do things like that, punishment turns into being over-controlling and manipulative quickly.
When your man does something, you need to keep your confidence and stay in charge of your emotions. If you lose it, it shows him that he’s in control of you, your emotions, and your self-worth. Then, you both look bad. On the other hand, if your spouse is the only one to look bad, his embarrassment could be big enough that it will motivate him to change his behavior.
It’s important that you’re not playing the victim card. Don’t approach him with tears in your eyes and sob stories. This puts him back in control. You want to keep your power in relationships. Instead, take a deep breath. Then, use effective communication.
Positive reinforcement is more powerful than negative punishments. To use positive reinforcement, you consistently reward positive behavior. Don’t treat him like he’s a child, though. Do not tell him that if he can go a week without flirting with another girl that you’ll buy him a new pair of shoes he wants. It’s demeaning.
Instead, simply pay attention to his actions. When he remembers an anniversary or he’s able to not flirt with other girls, tell him how much it means to you. Then, kiss him on the cheek and cook him his favorite meal. Try something nasty in the bedroom that he’s been mentioning. Guys listen to words, but they remember actions.
Don’t ignore everything that he does as if he is not there. However, don’t initiate contact either. No phone calls. No reaching out to him. If he wants to talk to you, he needs to make the effort. Don’t be too happy to talk to him either. When your feelings are hurt, you need to let him know that.
8. Make sure your spouse knows what the problem is
Sometimes, men are just clueless. They simply are. When you’re in a relationship and he does something to offend you, there’s a chance that he has no idea what he has done. Before you start considering a punishment, make sure that you tell him exactly what he did. That could be all it takes to make him realize that he seriously messed up.
Sometimes, people can be a bit stubborn. They tend to dismiss others’ feelings until they are put in the same situation. That’s where giving him exactly what he gave you can work in your favor. If he was out partying with his friends all night and rejected your calls, do the same to him. Show him exactly what it feels like.
This works out for you in two ways. First, it forces him to empathize with you. He’ll have to know exactly how you felt because you’re doing the same thing to him. Second, you get to punish him a little bit which, although not healthy, might make you feel better.
Remember, men remember actions more than they do words. Instead of saying anything, simply leave for a bit. Tell him you’re going to go for a drive, and then leave for the afternoon. This worked exceptionally well with my ex-fiance. While I was gone, he had plenty of time to think about things.
11. Don’t give him an ultimatum unless you mean it
When looking for ways to punish your man, you’re going to think of ultimatums. We all do at some point. For example, I’m not going to stay in a relationship with you if you continue to (insert horrible behavior of his.) However, these can backfire big time if you don’t mean them.