How to Ask Someone Out on Bumble

Start small. Instead of going bold and asking for a date outright, start small by chatting back and forth for a few days — or weeks! — is a low-key way to get a little more personal without getting too intimate, too soon.

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Be specific when asking someone out

If you genuinely want to get to know someone in person, don’t be afraid to be confident in your approach. Present them with a concrete plan: Rather than saying something vague like, “We should hang out sometime” or “Want to grab drinks?” it’s better to name a specific time and a place, or at least a clear idea of where you’d want to go. Doing so will show that you’re serious, and allow you to gauge your match’s interest or openness level, says clinical sexologist and psychotherapist Dr. Kristie Overstreet. She suggests asking someone out with something simple and to-the-point, like: “I’ve been wanting to check out (restaurant/bar/place/activity/thing to do). Would you be interested in going with me?”

Consider using talking points from your conversation to ask them out

It’s a great idea to tailor the date to your shared interests, or whatever you know about your match so far. Look to your conversation or their profile for inspiration. For instance, if you were bonding over your love of music, you could ask them to a concert or a DJ set; if you’re both into the outdoors, maybe suggest a hike. If their profile says they like Boba tea, ask them if they want to meet you at your favorite spot. This approach will likely make the conversation feel smoother, as it’s easy to pivot from discussing your interests to coming up with a plan around them. You can phrase it as: “So you mentioned you like this. Would you be interested in going together this week?”

But don’t worry if you’d rather keep it simple

Of course, you don’t have to come up with a stunningly inventive plan — it’s a first date, so what’s most important is getting to know each other and showing off your personality. If you’d prefer to just get coffee or tacos, that’s totally fine, too. All that matters is that you suggest something concrete. Don’t be shy suggesting a time or place!

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