How do you ask someone to be friends with benefits?
You want to know how to ask a guy to be friends with benefits, but you don’t know how. Here is what to think about before you do it and how to do it right.
The actual act of knowing how to ask a guy to be friends with benefits is not the part you should be worried about. Nowadays texting is usually the way to go, and most guys will be on board.
But what you do have to do is make sure that right off the bat you make the right choices and are open about the situation. Friends with benefits can go south quickly if both parties aren’t on the same page.
Having non-committal sex with someone can sound like a great idea, regardless of your gender. But before you go trying to ask a guy to be friends with benefits, it’s important that you know the pros and the cons. That way, you can be fully informed and prepared for any outcome – good or bad.
Well, this is the obvious one now, isn’t it? That’s basically the whole point of having a friend with benefits. You get to have sex! And that’s always a good thing, right? You don’t have to wait to find “The One” and be in a relationship to get intimate again. [Read: How does being friends being best friends with benefits really work out?]
2. You don’t have to put any romantic effort into the “relationship”
Let’s face it – sometimes being in a romantic relationship comes with a lot of expectations. Presents, schedules, holidays…all of that. But you don’t have to worry about that with your friends with benefits.
When you have a normal committed relationship, you always have the obligation of seeing your partner on a regular basis. But with a friend with benefits situation, you are much more independent and your time can be spent on other things.
4. You don’t have to wonder when you’ll have sex again
When you’re single for a long time, it might feel like you will never have sex again because you’re not in a relationship. But you don’t have to wait to find a committed partner in order to have sex if you have a friend with benefits. [Read: Having sex with friends – 14 pros and cons of being sex buddies]
Depending on how close you are, he will give you some male company. Instead of sitting alone and watching Netflix, he might stick around and could even cuddle with you on the couch after your sexual encounters.
This is a tricky one, but it could happen. A lot of girls think they can “sex a guy into a relationship.” In other words, if she gives him sex, he will automatically want a relationship with her. It could happen, but don’t get your hopes up too much.
You might already have feelings for him and you think that if he has sex with you that he will fall for you too. But as we just said, that may not happen. And even if you don’t think you’ll fall for him, you might end up doing just that. [Read: Requited love – 17 ways to turn unrequited love into reciprocation]
On the flip side, maybe you don’t even like his personality that much but you think he’s hot. You won’t end up falling for him, but he might end up falling for you. That isn’t a good scenario either because then you will break his heart.
With a committed relationship, there are a lot of routine and predictable patterns to your relationship which a lot of people like. But when you have a friend with benefits, everything is more up in the air and there is a lot more uncertainty.
One of the benefits of a real relationship is that your boyfriend loves you and will be there for you when you are emotional. But a friend with benefits isn’t going to do that for you most likely. [Read: How to make an emotionally unavailable man fall in love]
If you are just friends with benefits with a guy, he might be dating other girls. This could make you jealous. He might even find someone he wants to be in a committed relationship with, and that would definitely bring out the green-eyed monster in you.
If you fall for him and he doesn’t feel the same way, you might end up heartbroken. And as we just said, what if he finds someone he wants to have a real relationship with? This could definitely hurt your self-esteem because you’ll wonder, “why didn’t he want me?” [Read: What does friends with benefits mean to a guy? Do guys get hooked?]
Although plenty of guys would be over the moon for this type of offer, it is not for everyone. Before getting into the nitty-gritty remember that he can say no or he may want to think about it.
Just because friends with benefits equals no strings attached, that doesn’t mean it is an easy situation to enter into. There is a lot to consider. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules you should never ever ignore]
Before getting too far into this situation, think about why you prefer a friend with benefits situation over a relationship. Of course, you want sex, so that is why you would rather not be single. If you’re not happy on your own, this situation won’t fix anything.
It is important to remain self-aware. If you are too busy with work to commit to a relationship or just want something casual because you’re fresh out of a relationship, great. But this is not a cure-all for relationship woes and certainly is not a relationship replacement. [Read: 13 rebound sex questions to know if you’re actually ready for it]