The Best Text Messages To Send A Girl You Just Met
“Thought you might like this song:”
Lets say you were talking on a dating app, exchanged numbers, and are now about to text for the first time. In this situation, nothing beats sending a song you think they might like, Andrews says, as a way to break that ice.
It gives you something easy to talk about. And, as we all know, nothing connects two people faster than a shared love for a certain band. So let the evening of swapping Spotify playlists commence.
“Hey, I’d love to see you sometime soon. Do you have plans this weekend?”
This is a great place to start because it shows interest, but it also sets plans in motion to hang out, dating coach Janell OLeary, tells Bustle. And that, of course, is the ultimate goal for folks who kinda like each other.
Still feeling weird about being too forward? Remember this: “In the end if somebody likes you they will want to see you and hear from you,” OLeary says, “and the exact wording [of your text] wont matter.”
“Hey it’s [your name]. It was so great meeting you today. I really enjoyed the convo :)”
This text is simple, polite, and gives a compliment, OLeary says, which is a great way to start flirting. If they gave you their number â say, at a coffee shop or after chatting on a dating app â its also the perfect way to pass along your number, too.
Send them a video, an article, or a book recommendation based on their dating profile or what youve talked about thus far, and explain why you thought theyd like it.
“This helps them to know you are thinking about them,” Andrews says. It also shows that you listen and that you care. All good things.
Take a picture of something youre doing â cooking breakfast, walking your dog, watering your plants â and send it along with some context.
“Pictures are a great way to give them insight into what youre into and how they can be a part of your life,” Andrews says. It also spares you from having to use words, if that isnt your thing.
If you want to jump right in, text them something funny, even if its just a weird TikTok.
“Laughter increases our connection and can help up let go of some of that initial anxiety that comes with getting to know a new person,” Dalesa Martinez, PhD, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, tells Bustle.
Being fun and light-hearted also helps start your relationship off on a good foot, Martinez says, as itll encourage this type of positive interaction.
“This is a great conversation starter,” Martinez says. “Its fun, and allows you to get to know one another.” But dont forget to ask follow-up questions.
What did they like about the show? Who was their favorite character? What other shows have they watched this past year?
“You can get to know them by learning more about the lens through which they see the world,” Martinez says. “And thats the point of this whole texting bit, isnt it?”
Send this text (somewhat) jokingly to get them talking about travel goals and bucket list items. And see where the convo takes you.
“This text can give you some insight into who they are,” Martinez says. “Who knows? They may even open you up to something new that youd like to try!”
Not only is this a casual way to check in and say hi, this question also “tells you a bit more about how they use their free time and if it might mesh with your lifestyle,” Beth Ribarsky, PhD, a communications and relationships expert, tells Bustle.
If theyre still asleep at 2 p.m., Ribarsky says, and youve been up doing things since 7, you might want to get more info before investing too much energy into dating.